Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Not All Who Wander Are Lost

I spend a fair amount of my time reading, listening to internet radio, and thinking. I think about the future and what it means to me. What can the future hold for a cripple unable to tolerate the outside world?

Then again, who would want to?

Humans have allowed corporations, banks, and government to steal the wealth, prosperity, and health of our race and planet. 

Maybe it's a good thing I am stuck at home or I would be protesting everyday the stupidity of the human condition that has created such corruption. 

It's all humanity's fault too. 

Socioeconomic despair and terrorism has been done on purpose. The poison in the air, water, food, and everything else is also on purpose. Where have we been while this idiocy has transpired? While our children have been uneducated about freedom and their bodies fed toxins?

I wander.

I wander around the internet. I read what is going on in the world. I wonder why 6 billion people are aimless with all the connections being thrown at us on a daily basis.

Are sports and television shows really more important than fixing the broken mechanism of politics in this country? 

I wonder.

I wonder what it is going to take for those who are lost to finally ponder the future and how they can change it for the better? 

Not all who wander are lost...

But it seems all that is lost is because no one bothered to wander out of the fixed opinions, not facts, they are spoonfed on the television by talking heads. People actually believe what they are told from the alphabet news stations is real. The idiotic box repeats only what idiots know. It's a box of deception, for entertainment purposes only... Humanity has forgotten this golden rule.

When are you going to decide to wander outside the box?

The rest of us are waiting for you.





Monday, January 27, 2014

Calling All Cabbies, I Just Want to Breathe

Good god, man. 

I was going to go to the grocery store yesterday but I had this major migraine hit me. I was in bed with ice packs for over 16 hours. Probably too much Vitamin B Complex 50 and dried my infected sinuses out too much. 

I have a cure for that: start with half the B Complex, raw organic garlic cloves twice a day, and take my other supplements as normal. Then I can slowly work up to a full B dose. 

So today I went to the grocery. I needed rice, vit c packets, eggs, vinegar, romaine lettuce, and some thousand island dressing.

I jumped into the cab and gagged! He sprayed either himself or the back seat of the cab with cologne. I mean, it was bad. It was so bad I literally had to come home after the store and take a shower.

Cabbies, stop! There are many asthmatics in the world and a lot of those patients are children. I carry an oxygen tank. It's not like I hide my disability from people. Instead of wasting money on car fresheners, colognes, and god knows what else... just use a spray bottle with vinegar and water. Like 80-20 or 70-30, water to vinegar is all you need. 

Vinegar dissipates easily and when dried leaves no smell. Vinegar disinfects to boot. It's better than bleach, but it's acceptable in almost every public setting and won't give you chemical pneumonia. 

Trust me, switching from poisons to vinegar will help your health too. 

If you are cab driver, or know one, please let them know that vinegar is so much better and cheaper to use in their cabs. 

The rest of us who rely on their services will be better off as well.

And that's my tip for the day!

Saturday, January 25, 2014

Can't Lose What You Never Had

So I've lost my mind. This admission should surprise no one who reads my blog. Since the pesticide poisoning and black mold exposure, my mind is not what it used to be.

I always joked: can't lose what you never had... and that's been my mantra.

Until this last month, I began a new multivitamin powder and now a B Complex 50 with methyl B-12. My mind began clicking on. I started to remember things.

I remembered the Jestons: Heaven's to Mergatroid! 

It's amazing what a methyl group tied to B-12 can do. I have read that liposomal B-12 is actually better absorbed but one thing at a time. I got to see if this new direction works.

When you used to have a near endemic memory, life is difficult when you cannot remember what you did several hours hence, or control your movement, or maintain a normal body temperature. Life becomes unbearable without the little things going in your favor. 

Now I see a light at the end of the tunnel. It's a night light, but at least there is a light. I thought what I have done was the best I could do and then my body surprises me. I guess I have gotten to the point where my body is open to suggestions. 

That's fine by me. 

Next I want to feed it more amino acids and some glutithone as well as bone meal to save what is left of my poor teeth and bones. I don't want to wake up one day and break a hip.

With energy and nerve regeneration, I can begin to move and exercise. My metabolism will heighten and make me use my food better. Amino acids and antioxidants will detox and strengthen my systems. Then building body back up will not be difficult. 

Although I will always have to be cautious and practice avoidance of chemicals and mold for the rest of my life, well at least now, I'll have a better life. 

And a great mind can accomplish great tasks like rebuilding the body with research and diligence.

For instance, bone takes more than calcium to rebuild itself. Bone needs phosphorous and magnesium for starters with the calcium. Bone meal when regulated for impurities does the job well.

Exercise is vital to rebuilding bones. Jumping jacks, walking, five pound weights are great ways to stimulate bone growth. I see them in my future! 

Since I have been ill, exercising helped at first, just walking, but after the black mold exposure, forget about it. My chronic fatigue made it impossible even to this day to do a little exercise. Doing a load of laundry or dishes can lay me up in bed for the rest of the day.

Lazy is not me. So if I am lethargic after a chore, it's the illness not the person. 

People have got to realize that change. A viable, vibrant person stops, or slows down to a crawl, there's something going on inside the body. Eventually the halt will damage the emotions and the mind, a person who is sick doesn't need that pointed out. That person needs medical help and emotional support.

I wish my family had realized their actions caused my secondary collapse and tried to correct their error instead of condemning me to a life of solitude and supplements. 

So if you see someone struggling with low energy, get them to a naturopath or homeopath. That person needs to detox and get nutrition. It's not an overnight fix but in the long run, your friend or relative will feel better knowing you aren't judging them; you are supporting them in their darkest hour like you should.

Have a great and wonderful weekend!


Friday, January 24, 2014

Happiness in a Corrupt System

I had a lovely afternoon talking with neighbors. One was having a garage sale and a couple of others filtered through looking at things. I bought a couple of items. 

I needed some wire to hang a picture correctly and boom, there some was!

i discovered another person who has had employer trouble. It seems that the more neighbors I talk to the more I discover that employers do not understand or appreciate their workers. You wonder why we have problems in this country...

Don't treat your workers like dirt. When I worked I never saw in my job responsibilities that I must surrender my pride, self-esteem, and thought processes to accommodate management's ineptitude.

I am not a servant and I am not stupid. I get paid to do certain tasks, not wipe your ass. So if you hate your employees, that is your personal problem and never should become a retaliatory agenda in the office.

Going along to get along, an employee should never be put in this position. If you expect an employee to be under your boot, then guess what? The problem isn't the employee: it;s YOU. 

There are troubled employees. That's with any general population but most employees want to do a good job,. If you screw with an employee, then you are showing that you are the one that is unprofessional and should be fired. 

I dealt with discrimination at my former employer and I am so glad I am disabled now. The stress of working for incompetent people is over. I just wish more employees would start standing up against corrupt managers. 

It degrades the organization. It kills productivity. All in all, politics and discrimination in the workplace by management to create a culture of dominance and fear is just bad business. 

As tax payers and consumers, we can chose to support businesses that are fair to workers. Perhaps that would be a good way to change the business of being inept toward employees if we began voting with our dollars, instead of being slaves to the corrupt business model. 

And, start your own business. Screw employers who cannot appreciate what they have. Be the leader and example you would like to set for the world. 

If someone is taking away your happiness, remember to not take responsibility for their negativity. It's on them, not you. Keep the energy vampires at bay with white light, your own goals, and of course, happiness. 

Happy trails;) to you!


Thursday, January 23, 2014

Starving for Italian, Antioxdiants, and Adult Content

I admit it. I love pizza. Sometimes I must know a slice is in the freezer to make my life a little less dull. 

Today for instance: I needed pizza! I was debating about going to the store and purchasing something healthy. I didn't want to go. I didn't want to mess with a cab. I didn't want to mess with high school kids. I didn't want to mess with people getting off work. 

So I broke down. I order some pizza online at my favorite spot. My order arrived in record time... it was a slow afternoon. Good! I was really, really hungry.

To round off the fatfest, I wish Starbucks delivered too! hahaha!!! 

But this small order should get me through today and the weekend. I have chores to do and sometimes I forget to plan ahead (thank you, brain inflammation) and I almost starve to death. 

Luckily for me, I can keep my bill around $20 so I still have some emergency funds until the beginning of the next month. Here I was saving for a new pan... oh, well, hungry comes first before other necessities. I hate when my body goes into wasting mode, drops my sugar, and I have to suck on a soda or candy to level out so I can make something to eat. 

I have diabetics on both sides of my family. I don't think my shakes are 100% sugar related. I think my issue is with the need for amino acids and protein. Just in case, I have taken out 90% of sweets, except for my cocoa mocha (unsweentened cocoa and a dash of international coffee) with some agave flavoring in the mornings. Sometimes evenings too! 

Unsweetened chocolate is a great source of antioxidants. If I don't supply my body with chocolate, I will literally go hunting for it around the house or buy candy I do not need at the store. So I fix the fix everyday.

A great way to keep cravings in check. That is not to say have a Starbucks everyday. The little things matter more than the trendy. 

Now I'm tired. Full. Relaxed and ready to watch Vampires Diaries. Yes, I know, I'm too old for the drama, but luckily I have no one to make me feel guilty about my viewing habits. That's what happens when you don't have cable. Oh, and I watch Lost Girl too! hahaha! Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the undersexed adult population. Can you say: soft porn on Netflix with a sword? ;) 

Don't worry, I'm not into programs for the sexual content. I could really care less. I like quirky characters and different storylines. Anything to get my imagination flowing again so I can begin my own writing full time, well full awake time between chores and naps.

Well it's that time again when I bid you adieu. Good night! 


Mysteries of the Unknown

Isn't it great when you don't know what happened to one of your blog posts? I guess the universe did not like my dance analogy. Figures.

I'm sure I will rewrite it again someday but as for today, I would like to talk about personal honor.

I found a curtain on ebay I wanted to buy but the bidding time had ended. I messaged the seller. I got a reply that for $5 the curtain was mine. I was so excited. Living on a tight budget and a curtain that would finish my living room window was such good luck! 

I responded saying send an invoice my way... then silence. I messaged again and the reply from the seller was an abrupt: the item is no longer for sale. Say, what?

Thank you for reneging on your offer. I did not make an offer to the seller; I happily accepted an offer given to me. To pull an offer without reason sounds fishy. I'm sure she got a better offer and sold the curtain at a higher price, but that is why I am talking of personal honor. 

If I had made the same deal, I would have told the next offer: sorry, it's sold. I would not have reneged on my original offer in order to get even ten times more in return. I have some insight into the mysterious of the universe: the unknown consciousness of the fabric of time and space is like Santa. It knows when you have been naughty or nice. 

That little place inside that nags at you when you've done something wrong... that's what is going to get you in the end. Even if you have learned to shut that voice out and become hardened to the world, well, the universe still hears it even if you do not.

Good luck, bad luck... how many people have you screwed over? Hmm?

What I am talking about is not religion. I'm talking about your mind, consciousness, soul, and spirit. 

If you want to change your life, have better luck, then you have to learn to not only treat others with honor but yourself as well. So pump up the volume. Listen to that little voice inside your heart that speaks to you.

You'll be amazed at what it says and how life can be good again once you open yourself up to the mysteries of the unknown. 

Have a great and wonderful day!

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Roller Coaster Rides of Depression and Healing

Up and down. High and low. Welcome to the wonderful world of the detox process. 

I began a new vitamin, mineral, and amino acid powder a while back. I went on a high where I felt alive and well. Now I'm in the detox stage. 

Energy has given way to lethargy. Happiness has faded into depression. And bad dreams and thoughts have worsened.

I am hoping I get over the tough road soon. 

I did get some B complex vitamins ordered. I only hope they help with my energy level. If I have to be fatigued, then let it be most of the day, not all of it. I have stuff to do and I would like to have my chores done instead of thinking about doing them. 

Depression and chronic fatigue together are a mighty assault on my will. 

I do have a formidable will too. After the repeated abuse and poisonings, I wouldn't be hear if there wasn't a reason. If I wasn't so damn onry. If I didn't have a will.

Nothing in life has ever come easy to me. I have worked very hard to get everything I have. Sometimes I wish I could have a respite from the madness of the world, but that just leads to complacency. 

If I am anything, it surely is not complacent.

I am always searching, researching what life is all about. What the universe really is. Why I am here?

Everyone has these questions, but most others are satisfied with religious systems that are there to confine their souls to man made dogma, not to inspire imagination or creativity. 

I want to be inspired. I want to be free. I want to soar!

Isn't there something you want to do?

Maybe it's time to break the chains of society,find what inspires you, and ride a roller coaster of your own making with your destiny in mind.  Trying is not failing, failing to try is. 

Have a great ride!

Thursday, January 16, 2014

When You Wish and Hope

I had a fantastic evening last night stargazing. 

I even saw a shooting star. What made the experience that much more special is when I looked online and discovered the remnants of Comet Ison could have made the meteorite particles 

I'm going to go out again and see if another shooting star crosses my path. I have wishes to make. I wish I could get well. I wish I could help others like I used to do. I wish I could be a lecturer and exhibiting artist again. I wish... I wish.. I wish.

It seems like when I lay in bed on lethargic days like this one looking up at the ceiling that I do a lot of wishing. I wish people would know what pesticides do and stop using them. I wish others would try to understand how living in a bubble is not fun. How I wish I knew the right words to convince people not to be so callous.

But that is what shooting stars are for: hope. I hope that one day others will see the damage poisons do and no longer accept them as part of society. 

Wishes and hopes... those ideas are better than anger and bitterness. 

I lived there once. Never again. No one is going to interfere with my dreams. 

When's the last time you wished upon a star? Come out and enjoy the night with me...

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

By the Light of the Pale Moon

That's right, folks, it's that time of the month again. The moon is full in the heavens. All the crazies are out and the stars like to twinkle, twinkle. 

I cannot hide it any longer. I am in love. I love the night sky. 

I love Orion, the planets, nebulae, Milky Way... all of it!

I have these great binoculars that are just about as good as any telescope I have ever had but these binoculars are easier to position. Much more efficient. I do not have to fumble around with lens, or balance, or anything. I point and gaze.

And, I do gaze.... remember, I'm in love ;)

I may not be the best astronomer in the world, but I  am the happiest. Tonight, before I go to bed, I am going to head outside and look up at the near full moon and wonder. I will wonder why I am the only one outside gazing upward.

When you look at the marvels in our solar system, you can dream of worlds beyond our own. You can dream. You can see that we are but a small blue planet in an ever expanding red shift. 

Out there is where we come from. Out there is who we are. Out there is the undiscovered country of our own imaginations.

Won't you join me?
 

Have a great night!


Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Black Cat Fever Goes to the Dogs

My Bombay named Riley Skye loves to play fetch. She brings me her little toys and wants me to throw them so she can bring them back... over and over again.

For those who do not know, Bonbays are black cats. Super smart, super funny cats. Most people associate black cats with witches, black magick, and bad luck. Far from the truth. 

Bombays are part Birman. So that little bit of Siamese gives them a bonding quality to humans that is beyond compare. Somewhat vocal. Bossy, but fun, Bombays are a delight have around. 

Two of Riley's half sisters from another mother live outside in my garage. Chaun is funny always butting my hand when I try to give her dry food, so it goes everywhere. Samika is  beautiful and large, about twelve pounds!  Sweet as can be too. 

These cats are athletic with short dark chocolate fur that is silky and shiny. 

If you have never been owned by a Bombay, I highly recommend it. You will never be without a larger than life personality in the house. Or a watchful eye as you take a shower.

Now to hide her toys so she won't want to play "fetch" at two and three in the morning! hahaha!

Have a great night.    

Monday, January 13, 2014

Outgrowing the need for love? It's exhausting

That vitamin powder must be working, I vacuumed and swept today while I had a load of towels and dishes going in the other rooms. I like days like today. Once and a while, chronic fatigue takes a sick day and I am able to be a normal person for a few hours. 

Then, of course, I end up in bed for a few days recovering from the sudden burst of energy. Even the positive days become damned if you do or damned if you don't, but that's what happens with chronic illness.

I have a new cat outside and here I am trying to adopt out some eight month old, spayed and neutered kittens. Lovely bunch, but too much for me to handle any more, physically and financially. Sometimes I think the universe likes to play sick jokes on people in an vain attempt at cosmic humor. Dude, I'm not laughing... I have plenty of cats already. Stop it.

This is supposed be an old folks home, not Cattery 101. 

I guess the universe knew I needed some love and a family of my own. I love them all very dearly. Unfortunately there comes a time when the babies must leave the nest. I'm afraid mine have all outgrown my place and need somewhere of their own. 

Like all caretakers, if you love them, you must set them free. I'll have to begin the depressing process of finding homes for my little creatures. Then I will have empty nest syndrome after the house goes quiet.

I'll mope. I'll cry. I'll wonder why I am unloved and alone...

Then the universe will send me a new batch and you know I cannot say "no" to baby kitties.

What am I ever going to do with myself? 

Have a great and wonderful evening!    

Sunday, January 12, 2014

No Country for Old Women

So I had a crappy morning. Terrible nightmares will make anyone a little grumpy, but I soon found someone the universe sent to me as recompense: an old cat.

S/he has now decided that s/he too is going to live in my garage with the other kitties. Everything is fine until food time then this new cat growls while s/he eats. Poor kitty. 

I shush the kitty so my others will eat. All except for Irene, my cats have not been aggressive with their meals as they know I hand out equally from the can. Irene has since become quiet when she eats. 

However I went inside and got a second can to feed everyone and give some more to this new dark gray and black with long hair cat. S/he looks old. S/he should be in a home with an old woman watching television with s/he on her lap.

I'll wait awhile before attempting a stroke to see if the new cat is skin and bones or not. S/he sppears rather healthy albeit beat up and scared.

I guess that's how it is in the world these days. It's not a place for old women especially if you are a homeless cat. 

The universe decided I should shrug off the evil of my former life because it's really not my burden to carry and showed me that I am needed even just to give that TLC I am so famous for to the underprivileged felines of the neighborhood.

Have a great and wonderful evening!

Family, Friends, and Other Fantasy Creatures

Have you ever wanted to be someone else?

I find that I have those thoughts occur more often these days. Since I live virtually in a bubble for my own health and protection, I like to fantasize about going to the movies, theater, or anywhere... that isn't here.

Could you imagine living without much or any human contact? I have some friends who call but it isn't the same as sitting down and talking with someone over tea and crumpets. Okay, so I don't have tea or even any funny shaped finger sandwiches, but you get the point. 

I often dream of having people who weren't scared to be my friends. Who would help when I needed it without strings attached or complaint. Who wanted to be around me without chemicals or poisons on their person. 

But who am I kidding?

If my own family would not make the sacrifices I have to now on a daily basis, thanks in part to their unthinking and unfeeling actions about a leaky kitchen faucet that created the black mold that almost killed me (after an irresponsible employer and illegal pesticides and fungus/mold in the buildings/air ducts that nearly killed me approximately eighteen months earlier), why would anyone else on this planet make any concessions to be my cell mate? Even for an hour?

It is a sad and terrible realization to know that you are in it for the long haul... and in it alone.

I'm glad that I was made an introvert. I can stand lengths of time in silence, but I am still a human girl. I like to imagine me in ball gowns, party dresses, curled hair, perfect make up, and high heeled shoes. 

That is just a fantasy of what could have been. 

If only people would stop and think about how their actions or even inactions could affect other people. I guess that is another fantasy of mine: people who take responsibility.

I was erroneously under the impression that if you do wrong to someone you make it up to that person better than how you harmed them. Another fantasy...

And, that family or friends would take a minute to walk in my shoes before they ignore what they have done to me and still feel they are allowed to call me names.

After all I did to keep the family together... why would you treat me this way? Make me sick? Threaten me? Isolate me? Refuse medical treatment for me? Steal from me? Hit me? Bully me? Yell and scream at me? Refuse me basic care? Then abandon me for dead when you illicit the negative reaction you wanted after years of this torture to justify your getaway? Give me a break.

Even though I was very sick and fragile during the neglect, abuse, and torture, the brain has a way of saving it for later. So I remember what happened to me. All of it.

The night terrors continue... like the one that woke me with a blood curdling scream this morning.

I maybe alone, but I rather entertain what could have been then to see or hear from family or friends ever again who don't know the value of a person.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Information is Nice, If It Doesn't Rot Your Brain

Information is a curse. It's like truth. First you seek it and then it pisses you off. 

I was reading about how this guy went mountain climbing and now the glacier had receded and soon it would be gone... Dude, that's what glaciers do. Take a geology course or two.  Then you will understand why I hate the lies of Global Warming/Climate Change.

Once you learn the truth about how these fake so-called human caused disasters are being used to social engineering people's behavior and fund United Nations initiatives like Common Core and Sustainability, you cannot unlearn the information. 

You just sit and stew. 

So I wrote the guy's editor. I doubt if the information will get anywhere. I swear, people do not go out and do their own research. They believe whatever dunce head is on television. Or in his case, whomever he talked to in the pseudo science lab department of the local nuttery.

That is why I am glad I got rid of cable. For one, I couldn't afford it any longer. Two, I have more time to do things I want to do... like take naps, play with the kitties, and write letters to the editor, apparently. 

OMFG, I really did come unglued, but I remained professional in my correspondence, well, to the best of my ability anyway.

Some people's children! 

Speaking of other people's kids, the kitties are all asleep. I too am ready for bed. All my energy got expended pissed off and writing that online magazine.

I better rest up. I have a busy day doing dishes and laundry tomorrow... and some outdoor stuff while it is warm in the afternoon. 

Nighty night, fellow thought criminals! ;)

Friday, January 10, 2014

TGIF or Whatever the Flipping Day It Is

Since becoming ill, days seems to run together. I have to constantly check a clock and/or calendar just to keep up.

Time distortion has become a routine occurrence for me. It's like an alien abduction but without all the experience to make a best selling novel. I have missed minutes, hours, and my favorite: days. WTF? 

Brain inflammation, what a wonderful way to spend the last remnants of my life.

I usually watch a television show a night to keep me on target. When shows go on hiatus for movie events, specials, or holidays, I get screwed up. With nothing on Fridays, Saturdays, or Sundays, I have to find new and inventive ways to tell time. 

Sometimes losing time is a blessing in disguise. 

When I feel or believe I have more time than I have, I can enjoy myself more in the moment. I can get lost in a painting or movie or ebook or poetry. Lost is sometimes the greatest direction in your life.

Even though I have time to be lost, it does not mean my time as a wanderer is less meaningful, it just means I know the value of time. 

Value is different than price. My illness is a price. Value is how I chose to live it.

Have a great Friday!!!


Thursday, January 9, 2014

Why Does Society Smell like Whores?

Could someone please tell me why you all must spray items, and yourselves, down with smelly, horrible poisons?

I'm dying out here.

Since my liver cannot filter and breakdown chemicals properly, perfumed products cause substantial breathing problems. I'm still tight in the chest from an incident that took place an hour ago.

If you value your health, loved ones, or life, then stop trying to smell like a whore house. 

I gave up commercial cleaners, laundry soap, softeners, perfumes, body sprays... all long time ago. Now when I go out into public, I find that most people smell disgusting from all the crap they wear in their clothes, hair, and personage. 

For real, you guys smell terrible.

If I need to make something smell better, I use water and vinegar in a squirt bottle. I use vinegar in my rinse cycle for clothes and dishes. I save so much money using vinegar that I think all of you are crazy not to be using it!

I also use Free and Clear 7th Generation laundry soap and Free and Clear Method dishwashing tabs too. For deodorant, I use my chlorophyll for internal odor control (which helps externally) and pascalite bentonite clay for the outside (to keep my dry). I'm pretty much smell free and poison free.

So the next time you go to the store and reach for those commercial detergents, just remember those manufacturers aren't going to pay for your inflammatory induced diseases or your time off work because your immune system does not function properly in a few years.

Take it from me: the Woman who lives in a Bubble, it's not fun or glamorous to be this ill. 

Now to wash my new-ish curtains over and over again until I can stand to be in the same room with them... eewww!!!   

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

OMG, The Sky is Falling... NOT!

Today was kind of sluggish. The blue sky turned lined and hazy thanks to the chemtrails. So sad. My city is maligned with poisons and no one does anything to stop it.

All the dew is gone from my grass and plants. That is how I know our atmosphere is being messed with, the natural order is out of order. I wish someone would halt this brainless activity.

When the lines of chemicals start penetrating the lower levels of the atmosphere, all of a sudden, I cannot breathe. So I end up inside watching a beautiful day turn into a planet dimming, engineered nightmare. Thanks, global-warming/climate change liars. You are ruining a perfectly good planet, and my days, over nothing. Idiots!

Before the day was lost, I did clean around the house. So at least I got something accomplished. My cracked and bleeding hands will attest that I did in fact clean.

Ray, my old white cat, was sleeping on the couch covering his nose like his face was cold. He ventured into bed with me. He must be cold. He is resting on my legs where he usually sleeps at the end of the bed on a pillow or cover.

Oh, Ray just left me. Obviously some pertinent kitty cat business especially since some of the kittens awoke when I placed my dinner dishes in the sink. Then curiosity was peaked and tails emerged from the darkness... the land sharks moved around the living room as if their prey was not alerted to their presence.

Sounds like a book in the making to me! 

If only I would keep from falling asleep during prime time hours on the television. Granted most of my shows are on hiatus, but beginning next week, my shows are new again. I guess I should try nap time a few hours earlier so I can stay up to watch my shows.

Then I can start finding a few hours to start writing fiction again. 

Well once my medical condition allows for better brain concentration. I still cannot write or think with music or television on, so I have to work in complete silence.  Now that's annoying as all get out. 

So here's to rock'n'roll dreams and hazy nightmares. 

Have a great and wonderful night!




Tuesday, January 7, 2014

In Search Of: The Great American... Vitamin?

My Emergen-C Multivitamin was discontinued. I have been researching and trying to find a replacement this last month. Boy, has my body been a tyrant!

I cannot focus to meditate as well as I was a few weeks ago, my body has been fighting me about eating, and just the general malaise. Well, I was taking the packets three times a day with my other regular Emergen-C packets so I can function a few hours a day.

I went to the Vitamin Shoppe online where I buy some of my supplements. I discovered a powder multivitamin, mineral, and amino acid complex. At first, my body was: wtf? but now it seems to really like the vitamin, pharmacy tasting powder.

Finally. I mix the powder with some pineapple juice and we're good.

My only wish is that I could find one without Iron in it so I can take it as many times a day as I need it. I'm still researching to find something to compliment my entire regimen of vitamins and supplements.

I want to begin feeling better. I hate being tried and ill. It really is no fun. 

I did get the dishes done today, which is great. I get to eat dinner tonight on a plate! That is always helpful. I haven't decided what is for dinner so I guess I better go look in the freezer and pantry isles of my house. 

Then it's time for bed. The vitamins have made me spunk up and then crash right afterward. I hope the spunk takes on a life of its own so I can be more active during the day. 

I can't write that Great American Novel if I'm asleep in bed. 


 

Friday, January 3, 2014

Living the Vida Kitty

I never thought in all my life that I would be sleeping as much as my cats. 

I have so much to do and not enough money to do it... or any energy even if I was flush.

There is a virus going around that knocks you down, then a bacteria gets into your chest, and then the virus comes back to finish you off. That is literal. I have heard of others dying of this so-called flu, but I don't think it's the regular flu.

I know I have it. I have mucous  in my throat and chest; post nasal drip, chills, over sleeping... the works!

The illness began back in December, I fought it back with vitamin C packets and raw organic garlic but it came back this month. Well, I went out grocery shopping and that will get you every time! 

So I'm back on the vitamin C and garlic.

I' beat a similar infection/virus last year. It's just that if you don't take care of yourself and increase your supplements, and garlic, you can put yourself at undue risk.

This afternoon, I fell asleep listening to an online newscast I like to watch every week. I got onto myself, then I realized: if you are falling asleep for little reason then you are probably a lot sicker than you think you are.

For this weekend then I am going to live the Vida Kitty. I'll go get warm in the sun in the afternoons but for the rest of the time: it's bed rest, liquids, online television shows, supplements and garlic as far as the eye can see. 

I hope by next week this chapter of fuzzy mittens and luluabies is over. I have bulk trash to get out by the curb and I can't annoy the neighbors with a trash heap if I'm coughing up a lung.

Stay safe and be well!

Thursday, January 2, 2014

The Sweetest Things in Life Aren't Always Sugar Filled

I went to the doctor's today. Just a routine check up. Get weighed, have my lungs heard, blood pressure taken, and my one lowly prescription refilled.

Ah, the joys of chronic illness! 

I love it especially when my body decides to wake me up at 4am to catch the 730am ADA bus ride. My Central Nervous System (CNS) is forever damaged thanks to pesticides and black mold. Even on the bus my CNS likes to have a spaz. A little bump in the road or a little too much G-force and cue the panic attacks.

Really? My CNS needs a new hobby. This one is tiresome! 

Good thing I can anticipate what my body likes to do and I get out my Vitamin C packets. I drink a few of those tangerine flavored yummies and shazam! All better! 

When I returned home, I was very tired. So as I was eating brunch, a friend called. We gabbed until I could not keep awake any further. I went into my room and fell asleep.

Almost 5 hours later... I realized the cats had not been fed!  The sun was down but they were still resting on my couches, told you they like my living room furniture! So I fed them, took some meds, watched some tv, ate dinner, and now before I turn off reality one last time today, I have to enter a post on my blog.

It's good exercise for my brain. I still have my issues like: typing the wrong words, misspelling words, writing fragmented sentences, and not quite using the shift key with a corresponding letter to make capitals adequately so I have to redo the letter over and over again until I get the intended capitalization.

Frustrating really when I remember a time that my brain-hand-eye coordination did not have so many idiosyncrasies.

In the last year, I have managed to re-obtain some of my better vocabulary words. So if you see $50 words, I am not being a bore. I am applying what I thought I had lost for so many years. 

Use it or lose it!

And I have got to lose some weight. I am not huge, but I am not where I want to be. I guess I really am going to have to cut out more sweets... damnit! I love chocolate. If I do not have chocolate, I am a scary, irritable person. 

So removing the carbs it is! hahaha!!! I like a paleo/atkins diet anyway so getting back to it should be no problem if I can still squeeze some treats here and there into the mix. I learned long ago that you cannot deprive yourself, but you cannot be a glutton either!

Okay, I am done for real this time. Stick a fork in me! Off to bed and dreams of a better future. One where I don't have to be so structured and wary. One in which I am once again free to roam wherever my spirited heart shall take me.

Have a gloriously good night!


Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Baked Chicken and Brown Rice

Is there anything better than chicken and rice swimming in chicken broth, butter, salt and pepper?

I don't think so. I bake a chicken a couple times a month like I do a roast. Meatloaf, I don't have to get my hands dirty. I discovered my local health food grocery store makes a meatloaf that is so good that it does not last a day in this house.

I buy the meatloaf raw and bake it when I get home. Lord, have mercy! With mash potatoes and some vegetables, I am in heaven!

So baked chicken, roast, meatloaf... omg, now you've made me hungry again! 

Even though I cannot eat at restaurants, I have discovered that I can bring home some already prepared meals. PF Chang's has spring rolls and sweet and sour chicken when I need a Chinese food fix. When this brand is on sale, watch out! I will mow you down for it!

I hope you realize I am kidding about the mowing down of people. ;) 

I also can have a Starbucks when necessary, but not too often because it has too much sugar in it, and Papa John's pizza. 

Sometimes when the immune system behaves, I can be a normal person. Well except for my keyboard's missing "p". I have to copy and paste the letter over and over again. Thank you, kitties for dumping my keyboard on the floor. 

One day I will find that letter "p". 

I only hope it is not with vacuum sweeper. 

Have a great and wonderful night! 

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